life

Okay, there are like, two full bottles of Windex in this house. And some Lysol. Apparently Fantastic is the most effective, but I don’t think we have any of that. Don’t they all do the same thing in the end anyways?

It’s like the arthropods are attacking…or invading at least. Tonight there was a big spider just chilling by my flip-flop. Hello? Go away. Then Nahla attempted to catch it with a cup but he quickly crawled away. Really quickly. Then crawled back into the crack in the wall where he must live. I also killed two mosquitoes and a moth tonight. The laundry room is another story. It’s like the cobweb hotel down there. There was a black and white cartoon that I watched once when I was little and the hotel was full of spiders and webs. The laundry room isn’t exactly the same, but almost. Five spiders in one visit? And the fact that two of them originated from the dirty clothes on the floor is not comforting at all. My clothes. EW. So disgusting. As long as the spiders don’t come into my room though, I’m good. I never want to hold a tarantula again.

It was exciting, I cooked dinner for myself tonight and last night. Like, complete meals and everything, meat included. And they were good. So yeah, maybe I’m not so hopeless after all. I think it was because nobody was there, waiting to use the kitchen or watching me. Being alone in the house is okay, well as long as the evil one’s presence is not known. It’s still creepy though. And I haven’t been able to have decent sleeps lately. Random dreams and nightmares. The thunder didn’t help last night either. Scared me so badly, because I was already half asleep and dreaming, and then BAM, hello clap of thunder. I hid under my blankets, like I was five years old again. Except this time I didn’t have my mommy.

So it’s officially the first of July. And I have nothing to show for my summer. No money, nothing interesting anyways. I mean, there have been some random fun times but ultimately, the summer has sucked. I am so annoyed. I mean, it’s horrible luck about the restaurant flooding, but come on, now?? So in the meantime, I get to maybe have shifts at another Earls, or start working for GE again, as my dad recently informed me. Chapters is shit too. There are good days and bad days. Lately the bad days have definitely been outnumbering the good ones. I just don’t understand why people think that they can give you such attitude just because they’re the customers. What, you think I’m stupid because I work there? News flash; I am working so I can survive. I mean, dammit. I get paid and I have to set the great majority aside for rent. I have $15 for the next two weeks. Where does it all end? I can’t even afford to buy food now. Or do anything fun at all. I feel like one big charity case. I mean, I wouldn’t want to live with either of my parents, and I don’t want to rely on my dad. But I still just feel like some hopeless kid, stringing herself along, until something better happens. It’s just tough sometimes. And truthfully, you can’t empathize with me. I don’t want to whine; it’s just the situation. I know that eventually it’ll get better though.

I need to go to sleep, so I can get up and work for 8 hours, when I won’t even get holiday pay. Thank you multimillionaire corporation, for once again fucking over your employees.

Happy Canada Day!